Friday, December 31, 2010

Goodbye 2010*••




Bidding goodbye,
Cherishing the memories
And blowing away the negatives…
Leaving the past behind…
Happy to be alive,
Ready to face what tomorrow has in store! ♥

Thursday, December 23, 2010

Stairway Of Love..♥


You held on to me so firmly,
Yet your touch was so gentle.

Your eyes pierced into mine..
While your breath slowly and softly mixed with mine.

My senses soon drifted away,
When you pressed your lips against mine

And then
We let our bodies unite,
While you carried me slowly through the stairway of your love..! ♥

xoxo

Friday, December 10, 2010

Lingering Presence..


I'm swaying away in your thoughts,
And
As the wind blows...
It's as if you're trying to reach out to me.

I feel your presence touch me lightly...
It's so soft,
That for once I almost believe it.

But then,
I realize
That it's time I must accept,
That you're gone
And will never return!

It's just the cold night...
Trying to accompany me,
As I try to wash away your memories.

Once again, thanks RainBoy for reviewing :) You're amazing =)
xoxo

Friday, December 3, 2010

..


Why is it that I always write sad stuff?
Why is it that there's always a flow of negativity in me?
Why is it that I always feel so lonely?
Why is it that there is always a shadow cast over me?
Why is it that I always let my past haunt me?
Why is it that fear grips me again and again?
Why is it that I'm afraid to fall in love?
Why is it that I'm scared of rejection and being left alone?
Why is it that whenever I see hope, I avoid it?
Why is it that whenever I feel happiness around me, I find sorrow in it?
Why am I so scared to face the truth?
Why am I so scared to be me?
Why do I keep running away?
Why am I afraid to live once again?

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Hope..


When you're lonely,
Think of good times...
When you're scared,
Think of your guardian angel,
Holding you tight.
When the bad times refuse to pass
Be brave,
And face it all..
In this maze of life
Remember,
There is always a way out...
It's never the end of the world.

I know the picture's pretty random. I clicked it during the summer, and I really like it...so I thought of posting it up =)
Also, thanks RainBoy for giving me the title and for reviewing my work :)

xoxo

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Your hands move through my back,
Our bodies pressed against each others...
Our love is all we can breathe...
Your presence is all I want to feel tonight!

The picture's from the movie, 'P.S I Love You'. [One of my favorites] =)

xoxo

Sunday, November 14, 2010


*Lying in your arms,*
And breathing in your love...
*Kissing you softly*
And making some love.
*Feeling your heart beat close to mine,*
Drowning in your warmth,
*Covered in your love...*
What more can I ask for! <3

xoxo

Saturday, November 6, 2010

I smile at the thought of you,
And then...
I cry to the fact that I'm not with you..

Monday, October 25, 2010

The Cry Of The Youth - Will We Ever Touch The Sky?



Slowly,
We have outgrown from our fairy-tale lands,
And today, we stand on the cross roads of our lives...
Trying to digest the fact, that the real world is not as beautiful
As the ones we were once told about.

We have now been exposed to a world filled with choices...
So many unknown paths have been opened in front of us,
So many things we wish to try out...
But,
We are bonded and restricted,
Because of our confused minds and hearts...

So many dreams we want to fulfill,
But,
When shared-
We are called silly.
Parents on one side, peers on the other,
An unbalanced support we get,
And in the end,
It all leads us to nowhere...
And,
Once again we are back to the crossroads,
Confused which path to choose.

So many thoughts, just waiting to come out,
So many questions are filled in our minds...
But,
In this busy life which we have been imposed with,
We are forced to swallow back our dreams
And follow a path which we are told to take!

We all want to spread out our wings,
And fly...
Fly higher and higher and live the life we once dreamed about.

But,
How do we fly when are wings are always cut,
When we have the hopes of touching the sky
And living the life of our dreams...!

WE HAVE TALENT.
HE HAVE COURAGE.
WE HAVE DREAMS...
ALL WE NEED IS A CHANCE,
A MOMENT,
TO PROVE THAT WE CAN ACHIEVE!

We are the youth of today,
The future of tomorrow,
Just
Let us live and touch the sky
-This is our cry!!

Thursday, October 21, 2010

...


As each day passed
I wished there was something I could do...

As the time ticked away,
I couldn't face the fact that you had to go.

When I lay in your arms,
And when your scent filled me up...
When you looked me in the eye,
And when our lips touched,

...I wished the world could come to a standstill,
I wished you didn't have to go.

But,
The days passed,
You had to go.
You bid me goodbye

And now you are, miles and miles away from where I lie!

Every moment I spent with you,
Are very alive in my heart.

I can still feel your gentle touch
I can still feel your breath lift me up,
When I close my eyes and hope for the time to pass...
When I wait for you to come and tell me
That you love me and will always do!

xoxo

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Now I Know..


People come and go,
But very few stay till the end...
That I now know.

Promises are made by many,
But hardly any are kept.
In this path of life,
Nobody really holds our hand...
That I now know.

We gotta find our own way,
Our dreams we must fulfill on our own..
People try to put us down,
They pretend to care.

Nothing lasts forever...
That I now know
xoxo

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

...


Your warmth,
The way you touch.
Your tender kiss,
The way you look into my eyes,
So deep...
I'll never forget,
They are all a part of me now!

xoxo




Tuesday, September 28, 2010

GiVing In..


I can see you looking at me,
And I very well recognize that look...

Your eyes speak a lot,
And I know I got what you want!

I see you scanning me up and down,
Right from across the bar.
When our eyes meet,
I see you proceed...

And,
When you approach
And pull me to the dance floor,
I know it's time to have some fun!

Your hands slide around my waist,
your heavy breath I feel on my neck,
With our bodies pressed against each other.

And,
As the night passes...
Slowly,
We give in to one another.

xoxo

Friday, September 17, 2010

..


A young heart,
Yet a broken one...
Filled with guilt,
Mixed up emotions..
Trapped with fear.

Not knowing what to do,
Don't know what to feel,
Mistakes of the past
Not letting her live.

A life build up with lies,
Won't let her go.

Wanting someone to hold on to...
But betrayals of the past,
Cling onto her...

Leaving her,
Unable to trust.
All alone.

Monday, August 30, 2010

:)

Out Of My Dream World...
Up
And Out...
To Make Those Dreams Come True••*

Friday, August 13, 2010

...


I want to close my eyes,
And drift away in your memories...
And when I open my eyes,
I want to find you here,
By my side...
Close to me ♥

Monday, July 26, 2010

~♥~♥~


Holding hands we walk in the rain,
Silent promises we make to one another...

Monday, July 12, 2010

Guiltily In Love...


Slowly, he inches forward
And leans over me.
He looks into my eyes
And I just can't look away.
His hands slide around my waist,
And slowly, his grip tightens.
I hold onto him, but deep down...
I want to get away.
He kisses me softly,
I can feel him in me,
His scent fills me up,
His warmth touches my heart.
He holds me tightly,
And kisses me on my forehead.
I want to speak up,
But I'm filled with guilt.
I know I'm lying and I want to confess.
I remind myself, that I have no rights to play with his heart.
I want to tell him everything, even if it means I'll loose him...
But instead,
I lean on his shoulder and hold him tight,
I love him, but the guilt eats me up...

Saturday, July 3, 2010

...

So much to say,
So much to write…
So much to express,
So much to do,
But so little time!

So many thoughts,
I long to express…
So many feelings,
I can’t wait to pen down.
So many wishes,
I long to fulfill…

Endless things I want to do,
But time flies,
And leaves its imprint behind
With a pinch of regret,
That strikes me hard
And leaves me, not knowing what to do!

Friday, June 25, 2010

♥♥Magical Days♥♥



From a curious little child,
To today a girl of fifteen...
My wishes have changed,
But I continue to dream.
The only difference is,
I don't want to be Cinderella,
I don't want to bathe with my barbie dolls,
I don't see stars as magic balls,
And now I know that there's no Wee Wiley Winky hidden in my house!

As time changed,
So did it change me.
The lollipop days have gone,
But the sweetness remains...
And,
It still brings a smile to my face,
And sometimes I want to re-live the times
When I would stare at a balloon with my eyes open wide!

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Sweet Dreams..

Hi Guys!!
I know I'm been away for so long. I've just been totally busy with school and other stuff :)
But here I am now. :) Hope you've all been good!

Sweet Dreams...

Hush a by baby
Sleep with your broken heart.
He does not care,
So learn to get out of the pain!

It pricks, I know,
But he never loved you.
Close your eyes
And rock by.

Cry, but he won't hear.
Even if your tears flow,
He won't be near..
So, let go!

Hush a by baby.
You have to let the love go.
I know it's hard...
But you have to, you need to.

Take it all as a nightmare.
It's over,
It's gone. It has passed.
Now leave the shadows and walk on.

Take a deep breath,
Move out of the cover and make a new start!
Think of good things
And have a sweet dream!

Hush a by baby,
Leave all the worries to the sky above.
The stars are twinkling on you,
So don't you cry, don't you worry.
Just close your eyes
And have a sound sleep of angels and fairies.

Friday, June 4, 2010

Sometimes


Sometimes you're good to me,
Sometimes you turn your back on me.

Sometimes you say that you care,
Sometimes you just walk away.

Sometimes you're sweet to me,
Sometimes I see hatred in your eyes.

Sometimes you hold me close just like before,
Sometimes you push me away.

Sometimes you call and talk for hours,
Sometimes you ignore my calls and tell me not to disturb.

Sometimes you're all calm,
Sometimes you yell.

Sometimes you say that you still love me,
Sometimes you say that it's all over and there is no turning back!

Sometimes everything's perfect, just like before.
Sometimes it's all broken apart; I am unable to mend!

It hurts,
Cause I don't know what you want from me

My broken heart just can't stop bleeding
Cause you pop in and out all the time.

Sometimes I wish you'd walk just walk away
And leave me forever.

Sometimes I wish you'd hold me close
And be with me forever.

But most of the times,
I just wanna go back and make things fine between the two of us.

Sunday, May 30, 2010

Have You Ever...

Have you ever seen the way I look at you?
Have you ever noticed me blushing when you smile at me?

Have you ever noticed how quite I go when we're all alone?
Have you seen that shine in my eyes when you look at me?

Have you ever noticed how I always try to look good when you're there?
Have you ever seen how upset I get when you leave?

There are so many such feelings I have for you,
But how to express them, that I don't know!

Cause you are with her,
And my feelings don't count.

But,
Have you ever felt
That there's a special place in my heart for you?

And have you ever realized that my heart longs to be loved by you?

Monday, May 24, 2010

BettER OfF WitHOut YoU !

You’re kicked out.
The doors of my heart have closed for you.
You made me throw away the key
And now I don’t need you.

You made me cry
You played with my heart.
You tore me apart,
While you went out
Living your dreams!

I was such a fool
To think you loved me.
My heart must me weak
Cause your sweet fake talks melted me.

You pretended to love me
And when you got bored,
You left and dumped me
Like a piece of thrash!

You put the blame on me
Said I was a liar.
You said all kinds of shit
You treated me like crap.

Yes, I cried.
I was a fool to do so.
Cause I should have known you were fake
Your love was a lie
I was a fool to believe you all this time!

But don’t we say, love is blind?

But now I’m done with it.
I’m back and up on my feet.
I’m happy you left
I’m happy you opened my eyes.

I’m a new me and I so don’t need you.
I’m better off without you.

My life is too beautiful
For letting a guy like you ruin it!

I’m not crying over you.
You haven’t won yet.

You said,
Time heals everything.
This time,
Time will show you what you have lost!

Friday, May 21, 2010

Un Noticed


Lost Soul
Lonely Dreamer
Quite Thoughts
Drifting Away
UN-NOTICED

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

♥ I'm Right Here ♥

For a very special friend :)
Nishit here's the post I promised :)
Hope you like it :p


Don't feel scared or lonely.
I'm right here so don't you worry.
Just give me a call and pour your heart out,
I'll listen to you till you haven't calmed down.

I'm not there with you,
But my heart lies in your happiness.
For a great friend like you,
I can give away my life.

So just close you're eyes
And let your mind be clear.
I'll hold you close
And vanish away your fears..

Just feel me close,
And you will be fine.
Trust me,
And you'll know you're fine...

********************************************

Sunday, May 16, 2010

My Cry For You..


I’m lonely.
Will you comfort me?

I’m scared.
Will you wrap your arms around me?

I’m lost.
Will your eyes guide me?

I need you.
Will you believe me?

I love you.
Will you come back to me?

Hey Guys!
I know I'm writing just dark stuff nowadays, but I've got some happy ones coming up soon :) So bear with it till then :p

Also, a great friend of mine has stated blogging and he rocks. So do check out his space. He's crazy :) But he's a great buddy of mine, and your comments will really get him to write more cause his work is worth an appreciation :) His link is http://dreamsgetbizzare21.blogspot.com/

Thanks Nishit for being there for me :) You totally rock!

Take Care guys!
I'll be back soon with better stuff :)
*Hugzz*

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Crumpled

Left alone to face this pain,
Yes, you left me...
Left me alone
With a heavy heart,
Ready to break,
I watched you turn your back on me
And walk away.

You didn't give me a chance,
All my explanations you just didn't hear,
You were not ready for anything,
You just walked away...
And I just saw you disappear.

Left with a mind and a heart
With just no feelings or emotions,
Just the tears flowed;
Only the chills passed through me...

I was left dumb stricken,
Yes,
I was left alone by you.
While you walked away,
After shattering my heart.

I watched you become one
With the darkness;
I watched you disappear.

I watched my love leave me
Forever.

Saturday, May 8, 2010

Beat It All Out


Beat.
Rhythm…

Pump it.

Pop it.

Lock it.
Drop it…

Shake it.


Keep moving.

Let it all down…
Let it all out…

Dim lights.

Open heart.

Shake it all off…

Let it all pass.

Cause you have one life.

Live it with no regrets!

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Separate Ways..


Things have changed,
We both know they have.
We have drifted away,
It’s visible…
So why hide the patch we have built,
In our hearts for each other…

It’s not like before any longer,
We can both see it,
The love is fading away
So, why deny?

We thought we were perfect for each other,
But maybe we’re just not meant to be together!
Nobody’s to blame,
Cause we were both mistaken.

I care for you,
And I know you do too.
But we just don’t click together,
It’s a fact and you know it too.

I can’t take it any longer,
This fakeness has been going on since long.
I can no longer see that shine in your eyes,
And I can no longer feel my heart beat with yours.

Maybe it’s just temporary,
Maybe we just need to get away.
Stay away from each other for a little while,
And see what happens.

I know you feel trapped,
It’s the same here…
The only difference is,
You don’t speak up.
But trust me,

I know what your eyes speak,
I recognize the hidden feelings you keep within.

They say,
‘Set your love free’!
And that’s what I want to do.
If our love is true, we’ll land up together,
And if we don’t, it means we were never meant to be together!

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
Wink♪♫

Monday, May 3, 2010

Pin Drop B.O.R.E.D

Hey Guys :)
Okay, I have been staring at my laptop screen with word open since the past two hours but I just can't seem to write anything :( The words fail to come out!! I so hate it!!
Anyways, I'm listening to this amazing song by Kid Cudi called Day n Night. Check it out if you've got nothing to do like me :) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EUvbrY_ec60
The music is amazing and if you're a dance freak like me, you'll just be dying to switch off all the lights, and dance :) Yep, that's what I wanna do right now!
Dancing gives me this intense happiness which I think nothing can ever give me! I can dance anywhere and at anytime :) So...any of you wanna join me? :p Blunt Uncle, are you young enough to show me your hip hop skills :D
Alright, today I wanna introduce you to two of my best friends on blogspot who make me smile all the time! Blunt Edges[Uncle] and Rain Boy! Both of you totally rock my blogsphere :) Thank You for your amazing comments, Rain Boy and Blunt Edges, for your reviews! *hugz*
There are many more people on blog spot who have become a part of me. Lucy, who has recently started reading my blog. Thanks a lot for your comments. They mean a lot to me.
So...I've got nothing more to post today. The summer heat is getting on my nerves!! And I'm going for a shower!!
All of you take care :) I'll try to be back with something interesting soon. For now, here's a tag. Thanks Sakhi :D

Its quite an interesting tag and won't take much of my time. The rules goes like this:

RULE 1- You can only say Guilty or Innocent.

RULE 2- You are not allowed to explain anything unless someone messages you and asks!

RULE 3- Copy and paste this into your notes, delete my answers, type in your answers and tag to your friends to answer this.

Asked someone to marry you? Innocent

Ever kissed someone of the same sex? Innocent

Danced on a table in a bar? Innocent

Ever told a lie? Guilty

Had feelings for someone whom you can’t have back? Guilty

Kissed a picture? Guilty

Slept in until 5 PM? Innocent

Fallen asleep at work/school? Guilty

Held a snake? Innocent

Been suspended from school? Innocent

Worked at a fast food restaurant? Innocent

Stolen from a store? Innocent

Been fired from a job? Innocent

Done something you regret? Guilty

Laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose? Guilty

Caught a snowflake on your tongue? Innocent

Kissed in the rain? Innocent

Sat on a roof top? Guilty

Kissed someone you shouldn't? Innocent

Sang in the shower? Guilty

Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on? Guilty

Shaved your head? Innocent

Had a boxing membership? Innocent

Made a boyfriend cry? Guilty

Been in a band? Guilty

Shot a gun? Guilty

Donated Blood? Innocent

Eaten alligator meat? Innocent

Eaten cheesecake? Guilty

Still love someone you shouldn’t? Innocent

Have/had a tattoo? Innocent

Liked someone, but will never tell who? Guilty

Been too honest? Guilty

Ruined a surprise? Guilty

Ate in a restaurant and got really bloated that you couldn’t walk afterward? Guilty

Erased someone in your friends list? Guilty

Dressed in a woman’s clothes (if you’re a guy) or man’s clothes (if you’re a girl)? Guilty

Joined a pageant? Innocent

Been told that you’re handsome or beautiful by someone who totally meant what they said? Guilty

Had communication with your ex? Guilty

Got totally drunk before your exam? Guilty

Got totally angry that you cried so hard? Guilty

Anyone who's got nothing to do like me, can post it up :)
Take Care till then!
Love You All
xoxo

P.S: How do you like the picture I posted? I love making stuff on my shoes :)

Saturday, May 1, 2010

The Depth Of Memories...


1st May 2009.
Do you remember this day? We cut the cake at your house and then we went to US pizza. It was your birthday. You were crying cause he didn’t call. I was telling you it’s all right. Do you remember? Do you remember how close we used to be right from the beginning? We hardly knew each other that time and yet we used to tell each other everything! Funny, isn’t it? How we trust people so easily and blindly! I bet you’re regretting it now.
I gifted you pink colored glares. I sometimes wonder if you still have them! And I made you a card. I guess you don’t have that still! But if you do, can you feel the hidden feelings I had sealed in it for you?
Let’s get back to 18th April ’09. Lounge 9. Yes, that was where we met for the first time. You asked me if you were fat. I said no. I didn’t lie. Trust me. I never did. Not to you!
Remember CCD? I was upset. I had fought with my mum. You were upset too. Remember how we used to forget our worries just trying to make each other laugh?
Remember how I loved your Converse and how badly I wanted to scribble on them for you! Remember watching the final episode of Roadies together at your place and how badly we both wanted Nauman to win! And how you kept tagging me of facebook!
Happy days, weren’t they? Laughing for no reason. Playing in your society park, and you getting stuck at the height. Remember those sleep over at your place? Those long rides that took us to nowhere cause in the end, we had to turn back home...
Churches on Sunday, buying balloons on the highway, you breaking Jazz’s Tommy slippers…. I still have all those pictures and I look them many a times. What about you? Have you deleted all of them? Or do you still have them?
Our crazy nail paintings and girl gossiping!
Remember how we used to enjoy all the time even though we never had enough money!
The early summer mornings when we used to readily get up.
Riding during the monsoon, stopping everywhere to click pictures, to capture happy days!
Remember the scary house of Iscon mall? You, Paur and Ruch were so scared. You were going to cry!
Remember how you liked my hand bands?
How can I forget your kittens!
Our silly fights, long talks over the phone, our music and dance craze and your funny laugh to add to the beats!
Petrol getting over on the highway!
And what about, Say Cheese And Kiss?
Do you remember all these? Cause these memories are all so alive in me.
What went wrong? Everything was so perfect and then suddenly it all came crashing down. The five of us were so happy. Best Friends Forever. That was the name of my facebook album. Where did we go wrong? We were Best friends!
Whenever I go online, I do visit your facebook profile. All the time…I have a look at your pictures and I sometimes miss those days.
I don’t know why I’m writing this. You may not even want to read it. It’s 1st May 10. And this time, I’m not there. But, I’d just like to wish you a very Happy Birthday. I hope you’re fine and happy.
Just one last question…
After reading this do you wish you could go back to 18th April 09 and delete me from your life? Or do you wish you could go back to November ’09, so that we could resolve all those misunderstandings? Or are you happy we all fell apart?
You don’t need to answer these questions. I don’t even expect a reply. But, happy birthday once again Future Dentist! Study well. Take Care and remain happy always!

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Pinky Swear

Hey Guys.
I'm so sorry for not posting for so long. I had gone camping and I just got back.
So..for a change, I have a story here :) And not a poem! Hope you like it!

*************************************************************************************
When I turned thirteen, I looked at the girls around me and I was so confused. They were all into wearing skirts, putting lip-gloss (I remember, strawberry flavor was totally in), talking about boys, giggling for no reason, applying sweet perfume and reading fashion magazines.
In class, they would always put their one leg above the other, and expose their clean legs for the guys to stare at. The guys however were busy chewing gum, talking about Spiderman, soccer and playing pranks on the teachers. They always considered the girls ‘snobbish’.
I was glad, considering the fact that I hated the idea of wearing skirts and such flowery clothes. I would always tie up my hair, wear a tee, jeans and sneakers, and go to school. Ben was my best friend. We would both sit together in the last bench, chewing gum and making fun of the other girls. It was fun. We would watch soccer together, ride bikes and swim. Everything remained the same till we turned fifteen.
In the 9th grade, our homerooms changed and we were no longer together. We didn’t have any common classes and we hardly met, except for the weekends. And that also, we didn’t have much time cause Ben was taking higher level math. So, when we got back together in the 10th, we had our own set of friends. I had a group of friends who were like me. The girls were not snobbish and were simple. They didn’t talk about soccer though. It was either studies or making fun of the other girls. Ben had a mixed group and now, they did stare at the girl’s legs when they exposed them. And yep, Ben too, spiked up his hair and the tone of his voice had changed. When I would tell him that I wanted to go skateboarding with him, he just laughed and told me to stick to painting my nails. But nail painting was so not my thing. I just sighed and realized that things had changed. Ben soon fell for a girl who was in our homeroom, and was very sissy and silly as per me. She had long black hair and she wore lots of bracelets in her hand. She would always apply dark black kohl in her eyes.
During our spring dance, I saw the two of them dance together and I don’t know why, but I got this tight griping feeling in my stomach. I couldn’t stay there any longer and so I left. I had thought that Ben would call me up, but he didn’t. My elder sister noticed how sulky I had become after that day and she even asked me what was wrong with me. I told her what was going on. She laughed and said that I had a crush on Ben and I liked him. I didn’t agree to it and told her to leave me alone. “I know these things, sweetheart.” She said, and went away.
Later, that night, I went through Ben and my pictures and I started crying. I wanted to talk to Ben so badly but I just couldn’t call him up. I wanted him to call. I waited for a long time, but he didn’t. Spring break soon got over and it was time to get back to school. On the morning before school, I dumped my baggy jeans and wore skimpy jeans that gave and outline of my legs, right till the end. I even wore a pink tee that hung lowly on my chest. I kept my hair open. My sister gave me one of her perfumes. I was a little uncomfortable in the beginning but when my friends told me I looked good, I felt a little fine.
Ben noticed me in the classroom and waved at me. I waved back and I noticed he blushed. His friends teased him too. I felt happy. It all carried on the same way. Guys started looking at me from a different angle and I could sense that Ben was a little uncomfortable. I was now a part of the in-group and I now could giggle the way the other girls did. I started to like Miley Cyrus and I now liked carrying so many shopping bags and walking in the malls with my hair hanging loose behind.
I avoided Ben and I played hard to get.
Christmas soon came, and Ben invited me to his place. I knew that this was my chance. I wore an amazing black dress and a pink coat. I wore stockings and heels. I kissed Ben on his cheeks when he opened the door and I removed my coat. Ben scratched his head and led me inside. I met his parents and his mum told me that I was looking very beautiful. Ben and I then went to his room and he asked me what I wanted to do. I just flopped onto his bed and looked at him. “You look good.” I said. “Thanks.” He said. He turned his back towards me and started playing darts. I soon joined him and we decided on a bet. The looser would do anything the winner said. It was my idea and luck was with me that night. I won the bet. Ben raised his hand to give me a hi-fi, but instead I pulled him close to me, and gave him a tight hug. He hugged me back, but it was a casual one. I pulled apart when I realized he was uncomfortable. “So, what am I supposed to do?” He asked, flashing me a grin. “After dinner. I’m hungry.” I said, and walked out of his room.
Dinner was as it was every year. But, this time, I had wine and a little beer. I persuaded Ben’s mum telling her that I was old enough. She finally agreed to it, and gave Ben and me a little. After that we went back to his room. It was the perfect moment. I latched the door and switched off the lights. “What are you doing?” He asked me, coming closer. I pulled him towards me and looked right into his eyes. “The punishment!” I said. And I planted a kiss right on his mouth. I was hoping he would respond to it, but he pulled apart and switched on the light. “What has gotten into you?” He yelled. “Come on Ben, we aren’t kids. You know I like you, and you like me back. Right?” I said. “I do like you Bella. But it’s not what you think. We’re best friends and that’s it.” The words hit me hard and I started crying. “Come on Bella.” He said, and pulled me towards him. I rested my head in his arms and cried. “I’m sorry.” He said. “I want to go home.” I said. Ben asked me to stay longer but I didn’t feel like it. I washed my face and got Ben’s dad to drop me home.
Ben called me a lot but I rejected all his calls. He even came around, but I told my mum to tell him I was away for New Years. He even caught me online, but I didn’t reply to him. He left me many offline messages saying he wanted to tell me something important, but I didn’t reply to him. All through the winter break, I realized that I didn’t like the way I was. It suddenly struck me, that I didn’t like dressing in such a manner and I didn’t like sweet smelling perfumes. I was so frustrated with myself, that I opened my cupboards and took out all my dresses. I rearranged my wardrobe with my baggy jeans and loose T-shirts.
One day before school reopened, Ben called me again and this time I did answer. He told me he needed to meet me. I agreed to meet him. I put on my baggy jeans and sneakers and walked to the park where we used to meet earlier. I saw kids skateboarding and I realized how much I loved it. I sat down on the bench and waited for Ben. When he came, I could see that he had been crying.
“Hi.” He said. “What happened to you?” I asked. “Long story.” He smiled. “I have time.” I said. And so, Ben told me what was going on. His parents were getting divorced and he was shifting to London with his mum. I felt so bad that I wasn’t there with him through his bad days. He told me how bad things were at his place and how he needed to talk to me, but I wasn’t there for him. “When are you leaving?” I asked. “Tomorrow.” He said. The words hit me hard and I started crying. He cried too. We held each other’s hands and he held me tightly in his arms. “Thank God I can’t smell any sweet perfume.” He laughed, between his sobs. “Is that why you didn’t hug me before?” I asked him, looking into his eyes. “I’m glad the old you is back. Never change Bella.” He wiped the tears away from my eyes and looked at me. “I never liked snobbish girls and when you became a part of it, I thought I had lost you. In fact I did. I like you the way you are. Don’t change, please.” He said.
I could see the sadness in his eyes. I could feel every word he said. He cupped my face in his strong hands and kissed me lightly on my forehead. “I love you the way you are.” He said. I hugged him tightly and smiled. “I love you too.”
“Fancy skateboarding?” He asked me. “Sure.” I said. We took two skateboards from the kids and skate boarded till we weren’t tired and then he walked me home and we talked about soccer and made fun of the girls of our class. He even made fun of me, but I didn’t mind.
“School won’t be the same without you.” I said, when we had reached my house. “I know, I’ll write though. And I will visit you for sure.” He looked down and said. “Pinky swear?” I asked and held out my little finger to him. “Pinky swear.” He said and tangled his finger with mine. We stood holding hands not knowing what to say and then finally, he let go off my hand. “I’ll miss you.” He said and walked away.
I stood there and watched him till he became a park of the dark street. I sat down on my doorsteps and cried. My sister put her arms around me and told me that it’ll all be fine.
…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….................
School felt empty without Ben but then I didn’t have an option. I was in touch with Ben though. We would chat all night and would laugh just like old times. Hanging up was the toughest part but we had to. I got back to skateboarding. I joined the school’s girl’s soccer team and got friends who were like me.
I have a soccer match tomorrow, and guess what? Ben’s coming to watch too! He pinky swore to me that he’s coming! And I know this is one promise he won’t break!

Sunday, April 18, 2010

It's All Within You!...



Behind everybody’s smile,
There is sadness.
Behind everybody’s ‘I’m fine’,
There’s heartache.
Behind everybody’s craziness,
There’s fear.
Behind all of us,
There’s a dark shadow.

It pulls us down,
Leaves us helpless.
When we get torn,
It’s laughs!

It is wicked,
It likes to see us give up.
Well, that’s life!
Nasty, unpredictable and a scare ride!

It’s a path through the dark.
It snatches every caring person away from us.
It leaves us alone with our shadow,
It feels glad when we are scared!

It waits for us to give up.
It waits for us to turn back and cry.
It waits for us to loose all faith,
And when we do, it sinks us completely…

But if we try,
If we fight and cross the dark path…
It gets torn,
And gives us a change to walk in peace.

If we accept the loneliness
And walk all alone,
It shows us the light…
And gives us hope.

The end gets nastier.
But if we are brave and desperate,
Life gives up
And let’s us out in the light!

Don’t give up,
Fight through that shadow
Cause there is light.
There is real happiness.

Grab all the chances you get.
Be confident and trust yourself.
It’s beautiful in the light,
To see it, have faith and fight.

Once you’re out, the shadow’s gone.
Even if it’s back, it’s scared!
It won’t come out, till you break down.

Trust your heart,
Think with your mind.
The light is there somewhere,
All you need to do is explore!


-Wink ♥♥

Thursday, April 15, 2010

You Can Never Be Mine..

We sleep on the sand,
The water plays with our toes.
The stars shine above us,
While the summer breeze blows.

There’s no one else around,
The waves come to greet us again and again.
I lie in your arms,
You kiss me softly on my head.

You hold my hand,
I lie on your chest.
You smell of the ocean’s water…
Salty and warm.

You play with my hair,
While I sleep on your lap.
You guide me, you watch over me
You’re my pillow and my blanket.

You run your hands through my wet hair,
You kiss me again and again…
You hold me close
And whisper that you love me.

Everything is perfect,
Until I open my eyes and find myself on my bed.

You’re not here…you never were…
The only salty thing around me is my tear!

My hair is not wet,
There are no stars around.
The only voice I hear is my mums.

I realize it was all another dream
Which I know can never come true

Cause just yesterday,
You proposed to my best friend
On the very beach
I wanted to be with you!

Monday, April 12, 2010

Beautiful World


The cold night,
The look of your eyes,
The touch of your hand,
Your breath on my neck…

The chilly breeze,
Your arms around me tight,
The softness of your voice,
The feel of your heart beating with mine…

Those silly jokes you crack,
Those romantic songs you sing.
The way you carry me in your arms
Sweeping me off my feet

And taking me to a world
I never want to leave!

Wink♪♫

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Happy Me :)



You may say I’m crazy
You may take me as a tramp.
You may consider me mean,
But at least I am who I really am!

I don’t pretend,
I don’t live a fake life,
I’m an open me.
Like me?
Then good for you!

Your wrong judgments won’t put me down.
Your views towards me won’t change the person I am!

So, save your mind for somebody else,
Cause this is how I am
And I love the way I live!

Wink♪♫

Sunday, April 4, 2010

My Past



Bad memories I have so many
That they haunt me all the time,
They don’t let me rest in peace
Every thought brings me back to my past deeds.

I sit alone and feel scared,
The chills of bonded lies don’t leave me alone.
Whenever I look into the mirror,
I hate the person I see.

Not knowing what to do,
I’m lost and filled with guilt.
It’s all eating me from the inside
It has finally broken my heart,
And I am unable to mend.

The broken pieces still beat
With every memory that sparks within…
I feel like tearing myself apart,
I feel like screaming and running away from it all.

I risked life, played with it.
Now I have to deal with the consequences
Cause it’s too late to turn back.

No matter how many tears I cry,
No matter how badly I hate myself.
I have lost and now my past runs my life!


-Wink♪♫

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Spin me Around :)



Put your hands around my waist,
Let me lean on you,
Let me feel your breath
Let me feel your heart beat with mine.

Look into my eyes
And only listen to the music playing behind.
Let the beat capture your mind,
Let me capture your soul.

Put your one feet forward
And then let the other join.
Tighten your grip around me
And just follow me around the dance floor.

Breathe into my neck
Hold me tight,
Feel free
And shake along with me.

Don’t look around,
Cause it’s just me
My moves, my soul…

Breathe into my hair,
Feel those lights beaming into you.
Match with my moves,
Spin me around and round.

Let the music get into you,
Let the beats make us one
Hold me.
Hug me.
Kiss me.
Don’t let go of me…

Cause it’s a beautiful night,
With just you and me

Sorry Guys But My Dance Obsession Will Never Go :)
Love,
Wink♪♫