Solace..

Running away..
That is what I've always been doing. Running from every possible thing, from everyone who try to come close to me, to love me.
Solace.
I find comfort in the dark..the only place I rest in. Hiding under the covers that bind me, that dig into my skin..leaving me in a condition to not feel again. I feel numb. The dark is where I dwell. It gives me the courage to run again.
What is it that I'm scared of though?
That a gentle touch may bruise me.. That the warmth may burn me.. That the love will turn into hatred one day, and that I will lie hurt, in a position to not run again.
I'm afraid to face the reality. I suppress my heart from beating out loud. Scared to be held, but deep down I long to be loved.
Lying under the covers and crying my heart out..and when I wake up, I cannot face who I see in the mirror. 


I turn and run. 


Deep down, I just run from the person I am. Afraid I am, to love myself..
It's only in the dark, when my shadow lets me rest in peace.
.....


Yes I'm back. Finally =) Hope you've all been good! 
And thanks a ton Rahul for the lovely post that left me smiling! :D

Comments

  1. ♥●• İzdihër •●♥March 20, 2012 at 12:35 PM

    I can relate to this even I am running away from very serious thing.
    Glad to see you back :).

    ReplyDelete
  2. S.March 20, 2012 at 2:38 PM

    Hope this is a fiction..
    Welcome back :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Selvaggia CapizziMarch 20, 2012 at 3:47 PM

    Welcome back!! I've been missing you!!
    Don't Call Me Fashion Blogger
    Bloglovin'
    Facebook

    ReplyDelete
  4. SagittarianMarch 20, 2012 at 3:54 PM

    Running away is inevitable and the first thing 'we' especially girls always do when situation like this, I can relate with your emotions.. And I'm so glad seeing you back now.. :) Muaaaahhhhh!!:)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Rahul BhatiaMarch 20, 2012 at 4:18 PM

    Need not run away anymore , Juhi! Welcome back :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. Brian MillerMarch 20, 2012 at 6:38 PM

    welcome back! i think that some times we do get scared of being hurt...of being real...of being accepted....it is easier to live in those shadows but it is terribly lonely...

    ReplyDelete
  7. Sujatha SathyaMarch 20, 2012 at 8:41 PM

    we are all self-protective at some point

    welcome back

    ReplyDelete
  8. Carnett RoseMarch 20, 2012 at 8:56 PM

    Dear lord, I could have written this myself! Or at least, it seems like the many incomplete drabbles I wrote in a similar vein.

    Feels good to be back, right? :)

    ReplyDelete
  9. SoniaMarch 20, 2012 at 9:42 PM

    Welcome back dear.. Missed u.. U came back with the bang..:D Nice post:)

    ReplyDelete
  10. Jyoti MishraMarch 20, 2012 at 9:42 PM

    at some point of time u gotta sit back n face the situation.. we all feel like running from odds, its in our nature.
    very strong expressions !!

    Welcome Back :)

    ReplyDelete
  11. CяystalMarch 20, 2012 at 11:07 PM

    You don't even want to know how similar my state is. You run away from yourself, think you can suceed in becoming somebody else, put up a smart facade, but it isn't really possible. Because we're better off being ourselves :)
    Great post .. loved the start here!

    ReplyDelete
  12. MysticMarch 20, 2012 at 11:07 PM

    Welcome back.. Brilliant words to express reasons of embracing solitude.. ! Loved it !

    ReplyDelete
  13. UpasanaMarch 21, 2012 at 2:20 AM

    Lovely words and lines to describe the state of solitude.I could identify completely with your words!

    Its my first time here.And i am liking it already! Following you right away!

    My world, my thoughts, my musings...

    ReplyDelete
  14. Palak DuaMarch 21, 2012 at 5:24 AM

    amazingly written n expressed wid lots of honest words n feelings :) keep writing :)

    ReplyDelete
  15. Confused SoulMarch 21, 2012 at 8:35 AM

    I run away all the time. I wish I had a remedy :/ ..And hey you're back...welcome :D

    ReplyDelete
  16. JackMarch 21, 2012 at 9:40 AM

    Philo,

    Nice to see you back. How did the examinations go? I am sure Very Well. A good composition showing what a person who is unsure of self feels.

    Take care

    ReplyDelete
  17. NehaMarch 21, 2012 at 10:20 PM

    Hey, how have you been? You have an award on my blog :) Take care

    ReplyDelete
  18. ArundhatiMarch 22, 2012 at 1:31 AM

    Glad you're back! Hope things are fine with you.. :)

    And well well, this post is superb! Hope its a fiction!

    ReplyDelete
  19. M'Bai MadrasiMarch 22, 2012 at 2:36 AM

    Scared to be held, but deep down I long to be loved.
    Loved the above words..
    Happens to me too often!
    then all that i need is to run away from rest of the world around me too.

    ReplyDelete
  20. OvaisMarch 22, 2012 at 7:28 AM

    There's comfort in sitting in the rain too :)

    ReplyDelete
  21. suvaibaMarch 22, 2012 at 9:49 AM

    finally i am back too..!

    :)
    how have you been?
    well i agree with crsytal , i am on the treading the same path but i guess i will dig a new trench and move out soon.
    Fear , insecurity , accept that LOVE and be ready for that TIME when it will vanish right before your eyes is TOUGH or id rather say is TOUGHEST , it is UNEXPECTED and UNCERTAIN that is the beauty of it. so don't run , maybe just walk because someone can catch up with you that way. :)

    ReplyDelete
  22. br!nDleMarch 22, 2012 at 9:33 PM

    Lovely as always...Welcome back...:))))

    ReplyDelete
  23. Meet The MultifacetMarch 23, 2012 at 1:19 AM

    Good to see you back. Was reading a few of the previous posts. It made me feel different!

    ReplyDelete
  24. UnknownMarch 23, 2012 at 7:44 AM

    Beautiful Darling.... but lemme tell you one thing, never stop loving yourself.. fall in love with yourself and it will be fab!

    take care
    niya

    niya101.blogspot.com
    ramblingofaretard.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  25. The Solitary WriterMarch 23, 2012 at 11:20 AM

    now this is well written..penned it well Phil :)cheers

    ReplyDelete
  26. AnuMarch 23, 2012 at 8:02 PM

    Welcome back Girl!

    ReplyDelete
  27. Sri ValliMarch 24, 2012 at 10:00 AM

    I can relate completely to this post Juhi...touching one...Beautifully penned...
    "I'm afraid to face the reality. I suppress my heart from beating out loud. Scared to be held, but deep down I long to be loved."
    These lines are just awesome!

    ReplyDelete
  28. ShreyaMarch 24, 2012 at 11:11 AM

    Nice one. :) xx

    ReplyDelete
  29. Yu RaMarch 26, 2012 at 10:22 AM

    Hi! Welcome back!!!
    Well, i too feel like running from myself... nice one.. was totally able to relate...
    Every line is just too good!

    ReplyDelete
  30. Dreaming Wanderer. www.tonightidream-iwander.blogspot.comMarch 28, 2012 at 12:14 AM

    uv enjoyed ur fair bit of Solace.. n u were missed..
    glad ur back.. :)

    ReplyDelete

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