Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Solace..

Running away..
That is what I've always been doing. Running from every possible thing, from everyone who try to come close to me, to love me.
Solace.
I find comfort in the dark..the only place I rest in. Hiding under the covers that bind me, that dig into my skin..leaving me in a condition to not feel again. I feel numb. The dark is where I dwell. It gives me the courage to run again.
What is it that I'm scared of though?
That a gentle touch may bruise me.. That the warmth may burn me.. That the love will turn into hatred one day, and that I will lie hurt, in a position to not run again.
I'm afraid to face the reality. I suppress my heart from beating out loud. Scared to be held, but deep down I long to be loved.
Lying under the covers and crying my heart out..and when I wake up, I cannot face who I see in the mirror. 


I turn and run. 


Deep down, I just run from the person I am. Afraid I am, to love myself..
It's only in the dark, when my shadow lets me rest in peace.
.....


Yes I'm back. Finally =) Hope you've all been good! 
And thanks a ton Rahul for the lovely post that left me smiling! :D

30 comments:

  1. I can relate to this even I am running away from very serious thing.
    Glad to see you back :).

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  2. Hope this is a fiction..
    Welcome back :)

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  3. Running away is inevitable and the first thing 'we' especially girls always do when situation like this, I can relate with your emotions.. And I'm so glad seeing you back now.. :) Muaaaahhhhh!!:)

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  4. Need not run away anymore , Juhi! Welcome back :)

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  5. welcome back! i think that some times we do get scared of being hurt...of being real...of being accepted....it is easier to live in those shadows but it is terribly lonely...

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  6. we are all self-protective at some point

    welcome back

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  7. Dear lord, I could have written this myself! Or at least, it seems like the many incomplete drabbles I wrote in a similar vein.

    Feels good to be back, right? :)

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  8. Welcome back dear.. Missed u.. U came back with the bang..:D Nice post:)

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  9. at some point of time u gotta sit back n face the situation.. we all feel like running from odds, its in our nature.
    very strong expressions !!

    Welcome Back :)

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  10. You don't even want to know how similar my state is. You run away from yourself, think you can suceed in becoming somebody else, put up a smart facade, but it isn't really possible. Because we're better off being ourselves :)
    Great post .. loved the start here!

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  11. Welcome back.. Brilliant words to express reasons of embracing solitude.. ! Loved it !

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  12. Lovely words and lines to describe the state of solitude.I could identify completely with your words!

    Its my first time here.And i am liking it already! Following you right away!

    My world, my thoughts, my musings...

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  13. amazingly written n expressed wid lots of honest words n feelings :) keep writing :)

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  14. I run away all the time. I wish I had a remedy :/ ..And hey you're back...welcome :D

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  15. Philo,

    Nice to see you back. How did the examinations go? I am sure Very Well. A good composition showing what a person who is unsure of self feels.

    Take care

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  16. Hey, how have you been? You have an award on my blog :) Take care

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  17. Glad you're back! Hope things are fine with you.. :)

    And well well, this post is superb! Hope its a fiction!

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  18. Scared to be held, but deep down I long to be loved.
    Loved the above words..
    Happens to me too often!
    then all that i need is to run away from rest of the world around me too.

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  19. There's comfort in sitting in the rain too :)

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  20. finally i am back too..!

    :)
    how have you been?
    well i agree with crsytal , i am on the treading the same path but i guess i will dig a new trench and move out soon.
    Fear , insecurity , accept that LOVE and be ready for that TIME when it will vanish right before your eyes is TOUGH or id rather say is TOUGHEST , it is UNEXPECTED and UNCERTAIN that is the beauty of it. so don't run , maybe just walk because someone can catch up with you that way. :)

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  21. Lovely as always...Welcome back...:))))

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  22. Good to see you back. Was reading a few of the previous posts. It made me feel different!

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  23. Beautiful Darling.... but lemme tell you one thing, never stop loving yourself.. fall in love with yourself and it will be fab!

    take care
    niya

    niya101.blogspot.com
    ramblingofaretard.blogspot.com

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  24. now this is well written..penned it well Phil :)cheers

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  25. I can relate completely to this post Juhi...touching one...Beautifully penned...
    "I'm afraid to face the reality. I suppress my heart from beating out loud. Scared to be held, but deep down I long to be loved."
    These lines are just awesome!

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  26. Hi! Welcome back!!!
    Well, i too feel like running from myself... nice one.. was totally able to relate...
    Every line is just too good!

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  27. uv enjoyed ur fair bit of Solace.. n u were missed..
    glad ur back.. :)

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Your words mean a lot :)